How a talking fork helped me become reacquainted with my past life

Our homemade version of Toy Story 4’s “Forky.”

Our homemade version of Toy Story 4’s “Forky.”

Parenting is a solitary gig, even when done in pairs. You see friends and family less and less, and things you once did eagerly, and regularly, become a distant memory. That’s not to say it’s all a bum racket, but it isn’t exactly for the faint of heart, either (particularly when family, aka free babysitting, is 160-2300 miles away).

But it is what it is, and you do your best, keeping an eye on the clock—and so inadvertently rushing time—just waiting for the day when your kid can accompany you on various adventures. At age two, everyone says it’s OK to take your kid to an age-appropriate movie (oh, the cinema! Remember that?). But at age two, your particular mini-me shies away from crowds and cries at loud sounds, and the movie theater is, sadly, a combination of her two biggest breakdown triggers. So you sigh from the sidelines as children’s movies come and go, and you stay in. And in. And in.

(The vague recollection of you going to the movies 2-3 times a month pre-child feeling more and more like a different life entirely.)

But your child is growing, and though the triggers have remained the same, they are increasingly less so, and so one day – after you’ve gently mentioned how much fun it would be, little by little for weeks – she agrees that yes, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.

So you call a buddy, pack headphones into your bag, say a hail Mary (never mind you aren’t Catholic; you need all the help you can get) and head to the theater.

You hand her the headphones while you’re still out on the sidewalk; you make a game out of the escalator ride up; you buy her absolute most-favorite treat; and you head into your theater just as the movie is about to start (because you know better than to risk sitting through 13-minutes of previews).

When she opens her mouth to speak, the words that come out are precisely what you’d feared: “I want to go home.”

Sure, you expected that, but your heart falls to your feet all the same. But you’re not going to go down without a fight, so you pick her up and give her a hug. “It will be OK. Let’s just try it for a minute. If you don’t like it or it’s too loud, we’ll leave.”

You don’t expect her to agree, but she surprises you. These little humans are funny like that.

“OK,” she says. “Let’s try it.”

And that was that. For the next 90 minutes, she sits perfectly still, shifting only a little just to get more comfortable. She doesn’t make a peep except to laugh or say “thank you” when you hand her a treat.

As you walk out of the theater, you sense a strange feeling. It takes a second or two before you’re able to define it. Could it be? Is this really?

happy

So much has happened, so much has gone wrong, you’d almost forgotten what it was like. You can feel the moment etching into the folds of your brain, a veritable oasis after walking through four years of desert.

When you take a moment to reflect, you can’t decide if this is the absolute best children’s movie ever—or if what you’re feeling is really just the joy that comes with being re-acquainted with the theater. With your old friend.

Oh, how I’ve missed you.

When you’re in the bathroom for a post-movie potty break, the reality of the day hits you.

You can start going to the movies again.

You feel a weight lift as you welcome in a small bit of freedom. Your mind briefly turns to the rest of the day as you realize just how many tasks lay ahead. Your daughter’s little voice brings you back to the room as she finishes washing her hands.

“Can we make a Forky after my nap?” she squeaks.

You don’t even pause to think. The day has written itself.

“Absolutely.”