Tips and Tales to Help Our Littlest Students Get Ready for Their First Day (and Bid Farewell to Pre-Preschool Jitters)

If I learned one parenting trick from Fred Rogers (spoiler alert: I’ve actually learned dozens), it’s that anytime I subject my kid to a new experience, it’s crucial to set expectations before we arrive. Helping your child understand what’s going to happen—and giving it a positive spin—can be crucial to avoiding meltdown, tantrums, crying fits or even just basic jitters (our children, much like us, all express their anxieties in different ways).

To this very day, I recall many lessons I learned from Mr. Rogers as a child, so when my own little one came along, I was eager to share those same lessons with her through the miracle of online streaming (HOT TIP: you can watch old episodes for free on the PBS Kids app or on Amazon Prime). Add to that Daniel Tiger is a Mr. Rogers spinoff that has translated many of Mr. Rogers’ lessons (and even his songs) to cartoon form, and the parenting/childing lessons are nearly endless.

All a long way of saying: we’re big believers in setting expectations for our three-year-old. And with the first day of preschool just a couple weeks away, we wanted to make sure she knew what to expect. So we took a four-pronged approach. We:  

1. Watched episodes of Mr. Rogers and Daniel Tiger that deal with “going to school.”

2. Helped her get excited by letting her pick out a new backpack and occasionally talking about all of the fun things they’ll do.

3. Signed her up for a few different 30-60-minute classes where she’s “all by myself” while one of us waits outside of a door (usually behind glass). Our local library is amazing and offers one such class for free, and our budget was eternally grateful for that. We also did gymnastics and swim, which required some cutbacks to pay the bills, but the end result is a child who seems to have overcome the bulk of her separation anxiety.

4. Read some “first day of school”-themed books.

What we noticed with the “first day of school”-themed books is that there is an overwhelming presence of fear in many of these books, and we were a bit conflicted about that. Our daughter isn’t afraid of school—rather, she’s quite excited—so introducing the idea that there are things to worry about seemed, well… to create fears that otherwise wouldn’t have existed.

For example: our daughter wasn’t afraid of storms, or the dark, until she watched age-appropriate television shows about overcoming those fears. Instead of teaching her to not be afraid, they exposed her to the very notion that thunder is terrifying and monsters might be hiding in the darkness. Not at all what those shows intended, I know, but that was the net effect for a child who previously didn’t fear those things.

But all kids are different, and littles heading into full-day programs might be a little more concerned than those embarking on part-time adventures. So when it comes to books or television programs you’re selecting for your child, it’s imperative you have a grasp of how much anxiety your child is feeling (if any) and preview the material yourself before you share it with your child (something I obviously failed to do in the aforementioned scenarios—let my mistake be your cautionary tale). That way you can curate reading material to suit your need. If your child is expressing anxiety and fear, read stories that name those fears and can help your child overcome them. If your child is excited about school but is prone to anxiety and might feel nervous the moment they see you walk out of the door, avoid books that discuss fears in depth and instead look for ones that explain what a school-day entails. To help simplify things, I’ve labeled the below summaries based on how the books approach fear.

There are dozens if not hundreds of books out there on this very subject, and I’ve barely scratched the surface here. If you’ve read anything on the subject that you find to be out of this world, please leave a comment on this page with the book title, author and the approach the book takes. That way, parents who come here looking for back-to-school reading material have a more comprehensive pool to draw from.

---

I Will Be Fierce!
Written by: Bea Birdsong
Illustrated by: Nidhi Chanani

Approach: Fears are alluded to, but in such a positive, indirect way it’s unlikely to trigger anxiety.

Perfect For: Kids 3-8, whether they’re going to school (or riding the bus) for the first time, changing schools or just need a little motivation to help them conquer the day.  

Summary: This tale is all about being the hero of your own story, no matter what the world throws your way. It’s so positive and life-affirming, its title phrase could even serve as a mantra for adults heading to work. Essentially, a little girl wakes up ready to tackle the day, and she does just that in near-epic fashion. The story mentions monsters, dragons and giants though the corresponding illustrations depict images from an ordinary school day. She repeats “I will be fierce” every few pages, with all other sentences being active “I will _____” statements. For example: she says “I will dare to walk with the giants” while waiting with bigger kids at a bus stop; “I will conquer my fears” and “I will make my voice heard” when working up the courage to raise her hand to speak in class; and “I will build new bridges” when approaching a kid sitting alone in the cafeteria.

---

My First Day of School (A Pre-Level One Ready-to-Read Book)
Written by: Alyssa Satin Capucilli
Photographs by: Jill Wachter

Approach: No fear. This book is great for setting expectations about a school day and never mentions potential worries or anxiety triggers.

Perfect For: Kids going to pre-school or kindergarten for the first time who don’t know what to expect.

Summary: With just 1-2 rhyming sentences per page, this non-fiction book has a sing-song quality that helps kids grasp sentence structure, learn to read and hold onto the key message. It takes a very straight-forward look at the school day and even includes an appendix at the end that explains each part of a typical day (for pre-school or kindergarten) in short, easy-to-digest paragraphs. Topics covered include: arriving to class, free play, circle time, weather station, outdoor play, snack time, hand washing, imaginary play, block building, story time, music time, class pets and making new friends.

---

Butterflies on the First Day of School
Written by: Annie Silvestro
Illustrated by: Dream Chen

Approach: This book is about first-day jitters without any specific fears called out. It is a narrative that shows the different parts of the school day without necessarily naming them.  

Perfect For: Kids going to pre-school, kindergarten or possibly even first grade (especially if they will be riding a school bus).

Summary: This is a charming narrative about a little girl who is excited to go to school, but starts to experience “butterflies” in her belly the night before her first day. Butterflies quite literally fly out of her mouth with every interaction, but as the day progresses there are fewer and fewer butterflies–and she ultimately reaches out to another little girl with butterflies to help her feel more at ease.  

---

School of Fish: Friendship on the High Seas (A Level One Ready-to-Read Book)
Written by: Jane Yolen
Illustrated by: Mike Moran

Approach: This book explores potential fears as abstract scenarios with quick resolutions.

Perfect For: Kids going to pre-school, kindergarten or possibly even first grade who are likely to experience first-day anxiety but respond better to stories a little further removed from reality.

Summary: This story follows a little fish on his first day of “school.” It shows him meeting up with friends, riding a “shark bus” and playing hide-and-go seek in a clam shell—and being worried that their friend might never find them—and losing their lunch box. The resolutions revolve around friendship and sharing. The story is told in rhyme, with 2-4 simple sentences per page.

---

Superbuns
Written & illustrated by: Diane Kredensor

Approach: This isn’t a “first day of school” book, per se (I’ll explain why I’m still including it here a little later). Consequently, no related fears are mentioned.

Perfect For: Kids 4-8.

Summary: This story has no direct correlation to school, but I’m still including it in this list because of the import it places on kindness. Those first few days/weeks of school can be so crucial when it comes to making (potentially lifelong) friendships, but this can also be the time when some kids are first exposed to bullying. In Superbuns, kindness is one little bunny’s superpower. She spends her days being kind to everyone who crosses her path, even her kid sister Blossom who does not value kindness. But then a lost creature crosses their path, and Blossom—who is initially terrified—learns a valuable lesson about being kind.

---

NOTE: Many of the aforementioned episodes of Daniel Tiger are available in book form via Simon Spotlight. One such book, Daniel Goes to School, covers the first day of school (in that one, Daniel gets worried when he realizes his father won’t be sticking around for the school day). He learns that “grownups come back” and has fun playing with friends and partaking in everyday preschool activities. We’ve seen the corresponding episode of the show but haven’t read that particular book; I’ll update this post once we have it.

Old Navy, New Rage

Whoever designed the clasp on this Old Navy dress did NOT have people with hair in mind. Which is odd when you consider the majority of potential buyers fit that very description.

In fact, I lost a few chunks of hair throughout the day before getting it stuck so badly, I couldn’t move my neck. I was walking to my car at the time and had my keys in my hand when I tried freeing my hair from the clasp’s iron grasp.

So naturally my keychain ALSO got stuck, which means I’m in a public space with my keys stuck in my hair AND my hair so stuck in the clasp that I can’t straighten my neck. Mind you, this is a Toy Story keychain, so I’m walking around with Forky AND my keys in my hair.

(I kept my hand on the keys and just pretended I actually wanted them there BECAUSE PEOPLE WERE STARING.)

So I unlock my door by clicking the remote entry button ON MY HEAD, get in, sit down and somehow manage to free the keychain. But my hair is still caught in the clasp. 

I’m contorting as much as I can despite the pain and finally work it loose. I drive home, talk to neighbors, walk inside and put on a sweater (it’s 85F) to cover the clasp and prevent another incident.

I soon discover WITH HORROR that my contorting caused the zipper to be knocked off track, which led to the two sides separating. This, as you have likely sorted out, resulted in A GIANT GAPING HOLE along my backside.

(I’m not sure when it first appeared, but I suspect it was there in time for a few dozen people to see.) 

Next I’m trying to remove the dress, but I can’t because the zipper is stuck at the top. I do what I can for a few minutes before finally confronting the inevitable: I was going to have to go full-on HULK.

There’s no video evidence to prove it, but I’m pretty sure I roared as I reached behind my back, grabbed the top of my dress on both sides AND RIPPED IT IN TWO.

(If you’re wondering what material this dress is made out of, you’ll just have to trust me when I say it’s as close as you can get to carbon steel while still having pliability.)

So now my dress is in the trash along with my ego. All a long way of asking: anyone out there have some Super Cash burning a hole in their pocket? I know a girl who could use it, and she cannot afford the luxury of a lesson learned.

Crayola Unveils NEW Partially Peeled, Pre-Broken Crayons for Preschoolers

Every pack of Crayola L’il Nubz™ comes with a mixture of round and triangular crayons (because we all know they’re going to get mixed together anyway).

The newest product from Crayola has preschool moms and dads rethinking their back-to-school shopping. Called L’il Nubz™, these partially peeled, pre-broken crayons are being lauded as a game changer by parents and teachers alike.

“My 3-year-old used to spend HOURS peeling her crayons whenever we’d sit down to color,” noted mommy blogger Dakota McKenzie. “By the time she was done peeling the paper to her exact specifications, it was time to put the coloring book away. Now that I think of it, she was hardly coloring at all.”

McKenzie had been granted a sneak peek of this timesaving invention, thanks in large part to the success of her blog, “Mommy & MEgan.” Although she was skeptical when she first received a box of L’il Nubz™,  she changed her tune soon after handing the box over to her daughter.

Using an old school box of crayons, McKenzie’s daughter spent 14 hours, over the course of five days, on this page in her coloring book. Most of that time was spent peeling and breaking existing crayons.

“She went from no-casso to Picasso the moment that box hit her hands. Sure, she was a little confused when she first dumped them out and realized there was very little paper left to peel, but that just meant she was able to spend more time actually drawing and coloring.”

In addition to having the paper partially removed from some crayons and completely removed from others, many crayons are also pre-broken.

“I used to get so anxious whenever my son would crush Crayons in his tiny but surprisingly powerful raccoon hands. But with L’il Nubz™, the experience has been comparatively stress-free,” said social media influencer and stay-at-home dad Bo Sabe. “It was also a relief to see the box comes pre-distressed, with dented corners and a broken flap you can barely insert back into the box. That’s one less worry when I hand a new box over to my little bud.”

Daycare workers are also rejoicing, with facilities across the country recommending L’il Nubz™ to their parents.

“L’il Nubz™ aren’t just for preschoolers. We’re recommending them to all of our toddler parents,” said Annie West,­ director of Tots & Bots, a STEM-based daycare­. “We all know that toddlers, and even some older kids, eat their crayons. With L’il Nubz™, there’s one less non-food item making its way into their little digestive systems.”

A representative for Crayola indicated they had a team of researchers working on this project for years before developing L’il Nubz™.

“Our original design kept the crayons in tact, but encased in a virtually indestructible carbon steel shell,” said scientist Alexa Adams. “But we found in testing that we had grossly underestimated a preschooler’s determination to rip off the paper and break the crayon. So instead of preserving the crayon’s integrity, it was still destroyed, and more valuable creative time had been expended on freeing the crayon from its case.”

“Not to mention,” Adams continued, “Parents weren’t keen on spending $799.99 on a single box of crayons.”

A 24-ish pack of L’il Nubz™ retails for $24.99. Most packs come with 2-3 crayons already missing, so you don’t have to worry about looking for them under your entertainment center or between your sofa cushions.

“Her use of color since L’il Nubz is nothing short of inspirational,” said McKenzie of her daughter’s newest creation.

How a talking fork helped me become reacquainted with my past life

Our homemade version of Toy Story 4’s “Forky.”

Parenting is a solitary gig, even when done in pairs. You see friends and family less and less, and things you once did eagerly, and regularly, become a distant memory. That’s not to say it’s all a bum racket, but it isn’t exactly for the faint of heart, either (particularly when family, aka free babysitting, is 160-2300 miles away).

But it is what it is, and you do your best, keeping an eye on the clock—and so inadvertently rushing time—just waiting for the day when your kid can accompany you on various adventures. At age two, everyone says it’s OK to take your kid to an age-appropriate movie (oh, the cinema! Remember that?). But at age two, your particular mini-me shies away from crowds and cries at loud sounds, and the movie theater is, sadly, a combination of her two biggest breakdown triggers. So you sigh from the sidelines as children’s movies come and go, and you stay in. And in. And in.

(The vague recollection of you going to the movies 2-3 times a month pre-child feeling more and more like a different life entirely.)

But your child is growing, and though the triggers have remained the same, they are increasingly less so, and so one day – after you’ve gently mentioned how much fun it would be, little by little for weeks – she agrees that yes, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.

So you call a buddy, pack headphones into your bag, say a hail Mary (never mind you aren’t Catholic; you need all the help you can get) and head to the theater.

You hand her the headphones while you’re still out on the sidewalk; you make a game out of the escalator ride up; you buy her absolute most-favorite treat; and you head into your theater just as the movie is about to start (because you know better than to risk sitting through 13-minutes of previews).

When she opens her mouth to speak, the words that come out are precisely what you’d feared: “I want to go home.”

Sure, you expected that, but your heart falls to your feet all the same. But you’re not going to go down without a fight, so you pick her up and give her a hug. “It will be OK. Let’s just try it for a minute. If you don’t like it or it’s too loud, we’ll leave.”

You don’t expect her to agree, but she surprises you. These little humans are funny like that.

“OK,” she says. “Let’s try it.”

And that was that. For the next 90 minutes, she sits perfectly still, shifting only a little just to get more comfortable. She doesn’t make a peep except to laugh or say “thank you” when you hand her a treat.

As you walk out of the theater, you sense a strange feeling. It takes a second or two before you’re able to define it. Could it be? Is this really?

…happy…

So much has happened, so much has gone wrong, you’d almost forgotten what it was like. You can feel the moment etching into the folds of your brain, a veritable oasis after walking through four years of desert.

When you take a moment to reflect, you can’t decide if this is the absolute best children’s movie ever—or if what you’re feeling is really just the joy that comes with being re-acquainted with the theater. With your old friend.

Oh, how I’ve missed you.

When you’re in the bathroom for a post-movie potty break, the reality of the day hits you.

You can start going to the movies again.

You feel a weight lift as you welcome in a small bit of freedom. Your mind briefly turns to the rest of the day as you realize just how many tasks lay ahead. Your daughter’s little voice brings you back to the room as she finishes washing her hands.

“Can we make a Forky after my nap?” she squeaks.

You don’t even pause to think. The day has written itself.

“Absolutely.”

New phishing scam goes unchecked by Facebook

UPDATE (9/2/2019): After a brief slowdown in these ads following our story’s publication, they are back in full force as of August 31, 2019. All of the below warnings remain (unfortunately) relevant.

---

View fullsize

A not-so-new scam on Facebook has many users forking over their personal information – including credit card numbers – in exchange for too-good-to-be-true deals on Keen shoes.

Some users who have attempted to place an order noted they received a “timed out” screen when finalizing their order, while others had their orders appear to go through (though they received no confirmation emails). In both cases, shoes never arrived at their doorstep — but their name, address, phone number and credit card information were unwittingly handed over to online hucksters.

The ads first began appearing on Facebook and Instagram April 15, if not sooner, and a large handful of unlucky users have had their newsfeeds overrun by these scam ads. Although each ad appears to come from a different (fake) company, they all share a few common features: they have a similar layout, and they boast highly discounted Keen shoes, free shipping and fast delivery. Most of the ads come from bogus accounts clearly created for the purposes of the ad – they have no posts, followers or profile pics – though a few appear to be hacked accounts from legitimate (but potentially defunct) businesses. They all claim to be from authorized Keen retailers, but as Keen has told concerned consumers on Twitter: “This is not a KEEN official site or authorized retailer.”

View fullsize

As a lover of Keen shoes, I admit the first time this ad appeared in my feed, I considered clicking the “Shop Now” link. But something just didn’t feel right. So instead, I took a peek at the comments, which were flooded with words like “Scam!”; “Don’t click!”; “Report this ad”; “Don’t buy!” and even “They stole my credit card information.”

(This is just a small sampling; many of the comments also had some pretty unkind words for Facebook.)

So I reported that first – and presumably last – ad as “misleading or scam” and went about my day, thinking the unpleasant experience was behind me. But instead: the ads kept coming. And coming. The faster I reported them, the faster they arrived until it got to the point where 80% of the ads in my newsfeed were scam ads for Keen footwear. A quick scroll in my newsfeed today – at least 11 days after reports of the fake ads first appeared on social media – and nearly 1 in 5 posts in my newsfeed was a fake Keen ad. And even worse: I accidentally clicked “Shop Now” once when scrolling.

(I closed my browser immediately, deleted my history and cookies and then restarted my phone, but who knows what villainy now lurks on my device.)

It’s enough to make a person want to abandon the platform altogether, which makes me wonder: is it possible THAT – and not the credit card thievery – is the scammer’s true objective? It’s also possible this is a consumer advocate group placing the ads merely to demonstrate a very large kink in Facebook’s scam-detecting armor, though all signs at present indicate a malicious scam with no end in sight. And let’s not forget how reporting the ads seems to make more ads appear in one’s feed: clearly something is awry with Facebook’s algorithms.

View fullsize

This DM from KEEN to a concerned consumer was more than a week old by the time this story was published.

For their part, Keen has been turning the sites over to their legal team, though it seems clear they have nothing to do with the ads, and the responsibility of having them removed from Facebook should rest squarely on Facebook’s shoulders.

Any yet: more than 11 days have passed, and the fake ads continue. In some cases, Facebook tells me they’ve removed the ads. But for most, their response is far more unsettling: thanks for reporting, but we’re keeping the ad up for now. As someone who has paid for ads on Facebook before, I know they claim to have an ad review process. I create an ad, I submit it to them, and between a few minutes to a couple hours later, the ad gets approved and is posted. Which makes me wonder: what is their ad review process, and why isn’t it catching these blatantly fake ads?

A representative for Facebook didn’t respond to questions concerning this specific scam but says their ad review process “relies primarily on automated tools.” They check to see if the ad violates any of their Advertising Policies, and they reject the ad if it does. These “automated tools” are reviewing the ad’s text, images and related landing pages for violations before it goes live, and if an ad gets reported, it gets kicked back into the system for another review. It’s unclear if/when human eyes ever enter into the process, because the majority of the comments on these ads indicate the lion’s share of human eyes can see the scam. But sadly: that isn’t the case for all users, and some have clearly fallen victim to the fake ads.

View fullsize

“While we continuously evolve our tools and improve enforcement,” explains Facebook, “Bad actors continue to find ways to game the system. This is why we also encourage people to report this kind of behavior.”

But if reporting a single ad that’s part of a larger scam doesn’t help Facebook see the big picture – even if you feel like you’re painting the picture for them by reporting similar ads over and over – reporting can feel like a Sisyphean task. Since Facebook appears to be addressing the fake ads one-by-one using an automated system, rather than stepping back and noticing a larger scheme at play, this scam will continue to go unchecked if they don’t reconsider their approach, revise their algorithms and hire a few more humans to review suspicious ads and detect trends.

In any event, purchasing solely from authorized retailers and reporting the fake ones appears to be our only recourse at the moment. Well, that, and writing a story about it and hoping – just hoping – that it will eventually make its way to someone who can actually make a difference.

---

NOTE: The below fake ads are a small sampling of what’s made the rounds on Facebook. As of 4/27/19, the scammers appear to be switching up their game and marketing Skechers — instead of Keen — in their ploy. They also now occasionally make it appear as though the ad links to REI.com. Regardless of whatever brand (or product type) is featured in the ad, proceed with a dose of skepticism, and don’t divulge any personal information (including credit card number) until you’re 100% certain the company is legitimate. There are plenty of real ads on Facebook too, so if you’re unsure, check with the manufacturer. Or as my study hall supervisor used to say: “When in doubt: DON’T.”

If it’s too late and you fear you’ve already fallen victim to this or another phishing scam, the Federal Trade Commission recommends you take these next steps.