CREATING A BABY REGISTRY: The Not-So Essentials (Part 4 of 7)

THE NOT-SO-ESSENTIALS: THINGS WE GOT BUT LATER REALIZED WE DIDN’T NEED

We use an Ubbi, which does a great job trapping odors but is a bear to open, for cloth diapers. And a (too small) simpleshuman for disposables. If we could do it all over again: we'd likely get a larger simplehuman for both.

We use an Ubbi, which does a great job trapping odors but is a bear to open, for cloth diapers. And a (too small) simpleshuman for disposables. If we could do it all over again: we'd likely get a larger simplehuman for both.

Trash Cans Made Just for Diapers
I know these are tremendously popular and frequently appear on registry “must-have” posts elsewhere, but we quickly determined ours to be unnecessary. We opted for an Ubbi – mostly for aesthetic reasons – but friends who have tried both Ubbi and Diaper Genie have since told me they prefer their Diaper Genie. Ubbi can be difficult to open when you have your hands full of poo, whereas Diaper Genie offers a foot pedal for hands-free opening. Beyond that, we realize that when our daughter is no longer wearing diapers, the Ubbi will be useless. We’ll try to sell it, but ultimately we wish we’d just purchased a high quality trashcan with a foot pedal – something that would be easy to open, trap odors, and have a lifespan beyond the 2-3 years your child is in diapers. ­We use a simplehuman in our kitchen and think it would’ve worked well in the nursery, too. If only we’d known.

 


A “Messenger” Diaper Bag
We got a really cool Timbuk2 diaper bag that seemed to be plenty big, but ultimately it was uncomfortable to carry and didn’t seem to have pockets in the right places (it was often bulging every which way and barely buckled when fully packed). We regularly wished we’d gotten a more back-friendly backpack system like this, but we'd already exceeded our bag budget and wound up just using various backpacks we already had.

A Sound Machine Just for the Nursery
A small portable one is cheaper, and you can use it on the road AND at home. Plus, you’ll likely want an air cleaner for baby’s room; those make plenty of white noise and serve a dual purpose.

Baby Powder
We registered for baby powder because, well, who doesn't? But after seeing all of those reports about it causing cancer, we haven’t opened a single one – and our daughter has been just fine without it.

Car Seat Add-Ons
We registered for – and received – car seat head support, strap covers and an arm cushion. Luckily, we realized soon thereafter that car seat add-ons aren't recommended unless they are manufactured by the same brand as the car seat itself. Otherwise, all of those safety ratings for your car seat are rendered null and void, because they haven't been crash tested with those add-ons. So we returned the head support and strap covers but kept the arm cushion (thinking it wouldn't impact safety). We ultimately wished we'd returned the arm cushion too, as it only comes in handy if you're carrying with the nook of your arm. If you want to use your hand, it becomes nearly impossible (and at times dangerous) to grip. 

Wipe Warmers
Huh? Unless you live in Antarctica in a heatless hut, I don't understand why you'd need these. Keep your wipes out of the refrigerator, and you should be good to go.

Poorly Designed Baby Albums
It's so easy to design digital albums through a printer nowadays, but there's something to said for crafting that first baby book by hand. It's fun to have an envelope to store away that first lock of hair, a special sleeve for their hospital bracelet, etc. So while I recommend creating a book by hand using "real" photos, keep in mind the size of the photos you will be printing. We made the mistake of buying a super cute album with one massive design flaw: the area for photos is square but smaller than 4x4, and we have a horrible time cutting down photos to fit without compromising the image.
 


CREATING A BABY REGISTRY: Mystery Must-Haves (Part 3 of 7)

MYSTERY MUST-HAVES: ESSENTIALS WE HAD NO IDEA WE NEEDED
Many of the below items weren't on our radar when we registered. Others we registered for but had no idea just how much we'd use them.

NoseFrida Snot Sucker
I’m sure you never imagined you’d take up a hobby that involved using your mouth to suck snot from another human's nostrils, but that will all change once baby arrives. And rather than register for one of those squeezable bulbs – which many hospitals will give you as a parting gift (we use that freebie as a backup) – register for a NoseFrida and replacement hygiene filters. Lots and lots of replacement filters. Sucking out snot sounds disgusting, I know, but you’ll get way more snot-per-suck (SPS) than you will with the squeezable bulbs.

Boon Drying Racks
Get yourself a Boon system. Now. We hardly ever clear out our Boons (we have two – the small patch of grass and the larger lawn – as well as a couple flowers and twigs). We use it not only to air dry those hard-to-reach bottle parts, but we actually use it like a counter top cupboard (our clean bottles pretty much always stayed there when they weren’t being used). The only thing I don’t understand about Boon is why they market it almost solely to new parents: we’ll be using our system well beyond the bottle and sippy cup years. Boon also offers handy bins for your dishwasher (perfect for washing and drying small parts on the top rack).


Sleep Sacks (aka Wearable Blankets)
Swaddling is a fine art, and it can take some time – and a great deal of patience – to master. Sadly, failing at it could potentially put your baby at risk if the blanket becomes unfolded in the crib. Our swaddles came undone a few times, and though our baby (luckily) survived, we ultimately preferred to use sleep sacks. We used organic cotton sleep sacks like this for the first few months before switching to the Halo system as our daughter got older and we were less concerned about organic sleepwear. Halo offers a variety of thicknesses (from thin muslin to fleece) for all stages (including this toddler option with holes for the feet). Make sure you abide by the age, height and weight recommendations on your sleep sack, so your little is wearing the right size and model to keep them safe.

Car Window Screens
Our car is small and our windows are untinted. It quickly became a nightmare combo, with road trip breast feedings leaving me a ball of nerves (I support moms who breastfeed openly in public and wish I could’ve gotten over my own body issues that made me always seek cover but, alas, I could not). But that wasn’t even the worst part: our daughter’s vision was at stake, with sunlight sometimes hitting directly in her eyes. Sunglasses worked until she gained full control of her arms and could rip them off, at which point we decided to pay to have our windows tinted. Due to a comedy of errors, that wound up not working out, and we purchased window screens like this for our rear window and these shades for our back windows, and cut out these removable clings for the tiny, oddly shaped side windows between the back seat and the rear window. None of these look pretty, but they’re functional and helped make car time a little less stressful. If we'd found the removable clings first, we probably would've done that for all of the windows because, honestly, our car now looks like a science experiment with all of this mixing and matching. But that's besides the point. If you can afford tinting: do it. Now.

Baby Got (Propped Up On Her) Back... Thanks to a Boppy

Baby Got (Propped Up On Her) Back... Thanks to a Boppy

Nursing Pillow
Regardless of whether or not you plan on breastfeeding, so-called nursing pillows like the Boppy can come in handy. They make it easier to breastfeed your child (or really just hold your baby for long stretches of time). But that’s not all: they can also be used for propping, tummy time, and helping your baby get used to sitting up once they’re ready. You'll also need a cover; we opted for the organic cotton cover just to limit the number of chemicals our newborn was exposed to during those first few delicate months.

Back Seat Mirror
I honestly can’t imagine car trips without being able to look in my rear-view mirror and see my child smiling back at me. OK, OK, so maybe sometimes she’s screaming or crying. Point is, I can see her and know she’s (mostly) ok. We had problems getting a mirror to fit the backseat headrests in our ridiculous car, and ultimately this one worked best for us.

 

 

Skip Hop 3-Stage Activity Center
Many baby “essentials” aren’t needed beyond infancy, and if you buy them new and have no plans on a second child, it can feel like you didn’t get your money’s worth. That’s why we love the Skip Hop 3-Stage Activity Center. It has a sleek design with fun pops of color (no sensory overload unlike many other activity centers), and it gives infants who can sit up a chance to stretch their legs, bounce and play. Once your little one is walking, it transitions to a play table. In fact, we bought four chairs to go around it. Most days we only keep out one of the chairs, but have all four out when we have little friends over.

Homemade Diaper/Boogie Wipes
All babies are different, and wipes that work great for some might be a recipe for diaper rashes for others. That’s what I hear, anyway. We use Honest wipes for travel purposes, but when we’re at home we make our own wipes using flex-size paper towels, Dr. Bronners baby soap, organic coconut oil and filtered water. Our daughter is 22 months old but has had fewer than three diaper rashes – and those cleared up pretty quickly without medical intervention. We also use these at home in lieu of "Boogie Wipes." Want the recipe? Leave me a comment, and I’ll post if there’s enough interest. I got the recipe from a friend, and it has proven to be invaluable.

NOTE: We advise against using Dr. Bronner's baby soap for bath time. It is not tear-free, which we learned the hard way. We use it exclusively for making diaper/boogie wipes (which is super easy to do and cheaper in the long run).

We might've taken the "All Seasons" part of the Lillebaby carrier name a little too literally here, but we've found it helps keep our baby warm in the winter and cooler in the summer (with an extra panel you can unzip and fold down). Not to mention,…

We might've taken the "All Seasons" part of the Lillebaby carrier name a little too literally here, but we've found it helps keep our baby warm in the winter and cooler in the summer (with an extra panel you can unzip and fold down). Not to mention, it offers the best lumbar support of those we've tried.

Baby Carrier
There were times I thought about getting a stroller but not a carrier. And others: a carrier only and not a stroller. Give some thought for how, when and where you’ll be transporting your baby, and decide which system(s) are right for you because, honestly, you might not need both. Ultimately, I’m glad we have both, as we use each in different circumstances. In addition to light hikes and offering a closeness on walks that you can't get with a stroller, some days wearing a carrier might be the only way you're able to accomplish household chores.

We tried out a couple different carriers before ultimately deciding the Lillebaby Complete All Seasons was right for us. It offers lumbar support, multiple carrier positions, and you can unzip a panel for extra breathability for your baby during warmer months. Plus, there’s no need for a special “newborn insert” (which is essential for carting around small infants in other brands).  You’ll just want to read the manual to determine which position is safest for your baby based on their size. One caveat: you’ll want to make sure your baby’s airways are unrestricted at all times in the carrier. That’s one concern with all carriers, so even though the Lillebaby Complete All Seasons worked for us and is what I recommend, you should still try on a few different models – preferably with your baby – to determine which one is the best fit for you. Regardless of which model you choose, you'll still want to keep an eye on baby's mouth and nostrils to make sure they remain clear whenever they're in the carrier.

You might need to look at secondhand sites to find a portable bouncer (with handlebars) like this. Cat sold separately.

You might need to look at secondhand sites to find a portable bouncer (with handlebars) like this. Cat sold separately.

Portable Bouncer
This only came in handy the first six months or so, but boy did we use it. It’s pretty much the only reason I ever showered while on maternity leave. They work like this: you safely strap in your baby and use the handles to carry them around the house with you when there’s work (e.g. showering) to be done, and no one to assist you. But there’s a caveat: bouncers/seats with handles are becoming increasingly difficult to find, and I'm guessing it might be because of safety concerns.

This portable rocker came with our Pack N Play, and we sometimes used it in lieu of the bouncer.

This portable rocker came with our Pack N Play, and we sometimes used it in lieu of the bouncer.

The one we used is no longer available (it's a hand-me-down), but I stumbled onto this one – which works outdoors as well – and it looks pretty nifty, though it isn't a bouncer (it's more like a mini pack-n-play for newborns). I'm guessing true bouncers with handles are somewhat of a liability for manufacturers, as you need to make sure your baby is safely strapped in; you need to exercise caution when walking; and you need to make sure your baby is safe wherever you place the seat (but that kinda goes without saying with every aspect of parenting). That said, we never had any problems, and by 2-3 months, our daughter enjoyed her bouncer. Keep in mind, these come standard with some playpens. Don’t register for both when you can save by just getting one.

 

 

 

We use the Pack N Play changing station daily. Keep in mind, though, it doesn't have any straps. You cannot ever leave your baby unsupervised on this (or any other) changing table.

We use the Pack N Play changing station daily. Keep in mind, though, it doesn't have any straps. You cannot ever leave your baby unsupervised on this (or any other) changing table.

Pack N Play
Our ridiculous car isn’t family friendly (if we could’ve registered for a new car, we would have), so we sadly haven’t been able to take our Gracco Pack N Play on road trips. HOWEVER, we still use it daily. The first few weeks of life, the removable seat (seen above) occasionally provided a safe space for our child when we couldn’t hold her. But from the very beginning and even still now – because our daughter hasn’t tipped the scale yet – we use its changing station for the vast majority of diaper changes. And we use the actual “play” space for short time outs. The play/sleep space has also been used for naps by the babies of visiting friends. And provided you don't drive a clown car, like us, you can take the Pack N Play with you for hotel stays, trips to grandma's, etc.

 

 

 


CREATING A BABY REGISTRY: Getting Started (Part 2 of 7)

With so many types of baby products - and so many brands - sorting through it all can be overwhelming. Rather than ask yourself "What's working for everyone else?" the best way to manage the madness is to take a step back and ask "What's right for m…

With so many types of baby products - and so many brands - sorting through it all can be overwhelming. Rather than ask yourself "What's working for everyone else?" the best way to manage the madness is to take a step back and ask "What's right for me?"

When it comes to getting ready for your mini-me, knowing what you want (and need!) is half the battle. There are certain things – especially big-ticket items or those that babies only use the first few months of life – that you might want to consider getting secondhand. Furniture (e.g. cribs, dressers and changing tables), activity centers, high chairs and bassinets are all viable secondhand options. Bassinets in particular are only recommended for the first 3-6 months of a baby's life (depending on manufacturer recommendations on size and how soon your baby sits up), so unless you plan on having multiple kids AND have ample storage space, bassinets are a wonderful hand-me-down or marketplace item. I’ve heard mixed reviews on re-using bassinet and crib mattresses though, so you might want to research the topic further to make an informed decision.

DO AN INVENTORY OF HAND-ME-DOWNS
Are friends and family passing anything down to you? If so: yippee! Hand-me-downs are the best. If you can, check out those items before you register, so you know what’s coming your way – and what does or doesn't suit your needs – so you don’t potentially waste a registry purchase.
 

KEEP AN EYE ON GARAGE SALE SITES & LOCAL YARD SALES
Getting ready for your little one can be costly, but less so if you consider buying big-ticket items used. Facebook Marketplace, Craigslist and Ebay are among the many places you might find like-new products for way-less-than-new prices. As always though, be careful if you're meeting up with someone to pick up an item. Don't go alone, make sure you meet in a public place and if a listing gives you a weird vibe, trust your gut and pass.

 

SAVINGS v. SANITY
Saving money is great, but not at the expense of your sanity. Things like nursing pillows and baby carriers can lose their shape over time, so make sure you like the way the item fits and/or feels. Compare them to new items in a store to make sure the condition is on par with what you need.

 

DON'T STOCK UP ON ONE BRAND UNTIL YOU'VE MET YOUR BABY
No matter how prepared you think you are, some kids – including my own – will throw you curve ball after curve ball. For example: you buy 12 of one kind of pacifier, and your kid rejects it outright. But you’ve already opened and sanitized them all, making them impossible to return. So keep in mind that with certain things, you might not want to go all crazy stocking up until you know for sure what your kid likes. We’ll explore this more a little later, but here are a few items you might want to go easy on until you know what works best for your little rebel: pacifiers, bottles, diapers, wipes and baby food.


CREATING A BABY REGISTRY: Tips from Parents Who Wish They’d Known Better (Part 1 of 7)

We're all working together to put our bad registry decisions behind us.

We're all working together to put our bad registry decisions behind us.

Baby Registry Hindsight is 20/20
When my husband and I set out to create a baby registry, two things became apparent:

  • We had no idea what we needed.
  • We were in way over our heads with this whole baby thing (we already knew that, but attempting to create a registry magnified that realization by an infinite degree).

Trips to Buy Buy Baby and Babies R Us (R.I.P.) helped us get an idea of what was out there, but with way more aisles than there were people on our baby shower invite list, the sheer volume was overwhelming. We had to go to each store multiple times before we finished our list, and each trip was more unpleasant than the previous. 20 kinds of diapers, 42 types of bottles and what felt like 10,000 strollers and car seats?

It was just too much. And the fact remains, we didn’t really understand what we needed – and what questions we should be asking – until it was too late.

So I decided to put together a list of questions to consider when compiling a registry. It’s by no means comprehensive; rather, all it does is capture a few key variables we wished we’d considered prior to baby’s arrival. It would have made those first few months of parenthood easier, cheaper and – most importantly – less stressful.

I’m giving each topic its own post, so you can skip to whichever one(s) you need.  If you have any questions about anything you see here – or you'd like to see me cover an entirely different topic – please leave a note in the comments.

GETTING STARTED

MYSTERY MUST-HAVES: ESSENTIALS WE HAD NO IDEA WE NEEDED

THE NOT-SO-ESSENTIALS: THINGS WE GOT BUT LATER REALIZED WE DIDN’T NEED

CAR SEATS & STROLLERS

THE DIAPER DILEMMA 

BOTTLE BASICS

Universal Thread Clothing Line "Drops" at Target

She's only with him for his pockets

She's only with him for his pockets

I'm going to be perfectly honest here: I hate shopping for clothes. I know, I know. What kind of woman am I? One who doesn't cave to archaic gender stereotypes, I suppose. That said, I do have a soft spot for Target designs. And since I seldom venture to real clothing stores, picking up a pair of jeans while stocking up on cat litter is pretty much a match made in retail heaven.

So when my one pair of Denizen jeans had been pushed to the limit (which is to say: literally cracking at the seams), I added "jeans" to my shopping list and headed to Target, where I found their newest exclusive clothing line: Universal Thread.

"Wonderful!" I thought. "Two dollars cheaper than Denizen, but the material feels like it will have more than a three-month lifespan!"

So I tried on a few varieties before settling on mid-rise skinny (for the record: I normally despise skinny jeans and really wanted boot cut but, alas, their only boot cut offering came with rips and tears that would draw unwanted attention to – rather than hide – the fact that I live on a strict budget). I was otherwise fine with my decision until I removed the tags, washed the jeans, tucked in my cell phone, and then...

Dropped. My. Phone.

I'm not even kidding. The phone is stuffed into the pocket as far as it can go.

I'm not even kidding. The phone is stuffed into the pocket as far as it can go.

You might think "Oh, it's more than half in. My phone will be safe here." But you would be wrong. The simple act of sitting will force the phone out of your pocket. Ditto with a brisk walk.

You might think "Oh, it's more than half in. My phone will be safe here." But you would be wrong. The simple act of sitting will force the phone out of your pocket. Ditto with a brisk walk.

Yes, that's right, smartphone users. These jeans absolutely cannot accommodate a standard-size phone (and certainly not anything of the “plus” variety). In the vertical position, not even half of the phone tucks into the pocket. In a horizontal position, about 1/4 pops out. So you put your phone in the horizontal position, nervously hoping the phone gods will bless your device and keep it safe from harm. 

But. There. Are. No. Phone. Gods.

In the past two weeks, I have dropped my phone near (but not "in," thank you fictional phone gods!) the toilet on two occasions. On hard cement: four times. On walks when I almost didn't hear the "thud!" as it landed on a softer surface: three times.

In short: it's a miracle I still have a working phone.

But it's not just "large" items like small phones that pop out. I've lost tissues, cough drops and keys. The pockets on these babies have been an absolute nightmare. And so I say to Target and Universal Thread:

  1. Pocket form should follow pocket function. If they aren't usable, they're useless.
  2. Women need pockets, too. A lack of functional pockets on women's clothing is an age-old problem, AND IT HAS TO STOP. (This is pretty much the same point as #1, but it bears repeating).

This pocket issue has been discussed ad nauseam, but instead of listening, the fashion industry just keeps giving us "slimming" designs (that's how Target describes the Universal Thread pockets) that serve zero functional purpose.

To be fair, I've since checked out the pockets on their hole-y boot cut model, and I'm happy to report they seem to be somewhat more realistic – though still not quite up to snuff.

Horrible pockets aside, there are some pros to this brand: the material is soft and flexible, and they are – as I mentioned before – slightly cheaper than Denizen despite being better made.

That said: I still deeply regret the purchase. Unless Target volunteers to replace my phone in the (inevitable) event that it is lost or shattered, these jeans are a ticking time bomb and must be destroyed. Sure, they only cost $25 up front, but I’m thinking $825 big picture.

I don’t know about you but I, for one, refuse to pay $825 for jeans. And I will never, ever again purchase pants without doing a quick “phone fit” test.

I suggest you do the same.

 

PS: It took incredible restraint for me to not include a “Universal Dread” joke in here somewhere. Oh, look! There it is now.  


IN SUM: universal thread jeans

A REVIEW HAIKU
“What’s that sound?” you ask.
Just my phone hitting the ground.
Better pockets, please.

 

PRO/CON OVERVIEW
Pros: Affordable, durable and decent flex to the fabric
Cons: The front pockets are useless

 

TO BUY OR NOT TO BUY
Don't buy without trying them on -- and testing the pockets. Walk around and sit down to see if your goods stay where they belong.